- I still don't have a date for Satan's Yeast Infection 3. It will be next month sometime.
- I currently have Stef and Tucker 6 on the laptop. Hoping for a June release for that one.
- In the notebook, I have the quicksand story I promised after becoming really frustrated with Americans thinking the entire world is just like their tiny section of the USA (and that is one fucking huge country so it isn't like it has the same climate and beaches throughout anyways). It is currently titled The Tourists. And obviously the quicksand in it stops behaving like normal quicksand and the more time I spend on social media, the more annoyed I get with a certain nationality (ranging from that's kinda harmless but really fucking offensive to are you seriously trying to start a war and your beliefs are actively hurting the rest of us so stop fucking inflicting them on us unless you want to start paying the cost of the damage), so I haven't been on social media all that much (I lived over there so I know how they rewrite history and what their news is like, but with social media, which they didn't invent, but did do a lot towards its development, they have access to the outside world so there really isn't an excuse to be doing that). Hopefully after the USA election, they'll calm down, not insult the fact that Britain still has milk delivery, etc. I didn't do so well coping with this behaviour when I lived over there but until the past few months or so, I didn't have to deal with it unless I was physically there. So best I avoid it and focus on my own life. Although let us not forget that an election has to be called over here this year.
- Then after that one, I have something that is very extreme, very horrible and very in your face.
- Followed by my halloween story.
- Then formatting the Christmas story (I can't remember what happened to the dog).
- Then I'm free. I'll get back to what I had intended on doing last year, redo my dinning room and I have a collaboration in the works.
There isn't really much to update, except I've had another interview, still waiting to hear back about a short story and the hayfever combined with side effects from taking antihistamines is really unpleasant (at points, I haven't been functional, hoping to get prescription antihistamines this week as less side effects and might work better).
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Thank you so much for voting for Ketamine Addicted Pandas in the preliminary round of the Books of Horror Indie Brawl 2024. It got a lot of votes but didn't make it to the next round. And let's face it, something titled Ketamine Addicted Pandas wasn't about to win anything. I hope those who picked up the book enjoy it as much as something like that can be enjoyed. Good luck to those who made the final 32. You can purchase it from: While the Books of Horror Indie Brawl intentions were heating up, one of the splatterpunk Facebook groups hosted their own brawl. I entered Strip/Becoming and that made it to the second round. Thank you so much for voting for my book, but it went out in that round (along with some of my favourite books). You can purchase Strip/Becoming from: And while all of this was going on, An Unfortunate Case of Dick Rot stayed in the godless top ten for the entire four weeks it was eligible. Thank you so much for picking up this little rotten, maggot filled story. It can't really be talked about on social media for obvious reasons.
To purchase your copy, head to godless and find it here. It is hard to believe that godless is three years old and I've been there since the beginning. To purchase my first two godless releases: I was on godless within the first first weeks of launch and I thought Stara would do better given it is extreme, but people loved the bizarro fiction of Ghetto Super Skank, even with the terrible cover. (if you want paperbacks, both are available on amazon). I am working on a third cover for Ghetto Super Skank. I will eventually get one that I really like. I obviously just want to finish the fucking story I was writing now. I did have a lot of little things to update on here this week, including a landing page for A Terrible Case of Dick Rot.
So here you go (as it is easier to just post one link on social media):
There probably won't be any updates for a few weeks now. I'm clearly very busy plus I don't think I have anything else releasing until I finish Satan's Yeast Infection 3. The first brawl sets have been announced.
Sandwiched between International Women's Day (a woman at work handed out gifts) and Mothers Day, I've had a rough weekend. Had to fill in the rather insulting tax credits migration form as if I'm not working flat out and there's been some other things. All of which need to be documented (I have gone into this before). Then there's that cesspit that is facebook (at least unless someone says something direct to me, I don't need to document it).
I did intend on finishing two short stories and updating the website with a new and improved interviews page (the old one will be remaining in place as that would need to be manually sorted out and I just don't have the time right now). But I haven't done any of that.
Speaking of godless, I won't be having an April release. I've already spoken to Drew. I don't typically like releasing in June and July, but I've pushed back Satan's Yeast Infection 3 to May which pushes back Stef and Tucker 6 to June (at least I won't be releasing in July provided I get left alone to get shit done and unwind a bit). I was actually thinking of pushing things back prior to Friday evening as I obviously want to put out the best stories I can. I still have those two short stories to finish and even with quick writes and the amount of stress and upset there's been this weekend I really can't rush them. Hopefully there will be no more delays this year. I have big plans for my writing projects that were meant to be done last year, which matter to me more than dealing with social media and people behaving like self-centred cunts as if their country is the only one that has problems and drama lords over on social media. I'm obviously really excited that people are reviewing Ketamine Addicted Pandas. I know out of 500+ books on the Intention list for the Books of Horror Indie Brawl it has little chance of making it into the brawl itself, but it is so nice that people are reading it, reviewing it and enjoying it.
And it gets better... Ketamine Addicted Pandas isn't the only British Bizarro book on the intention list. Duncan Bradshaw has entered Cannibal Nuns from Outer Space. Duncan's been getting positive feedback about his book too. And hopefully there's more British Bizarro on the intention list. I don't think it is too late to add your book to the intention list. The more bizarro, the better. I have put Ketamine Addicted Pandas forward for the Books of Horror Indie Brawl 2024. I obviously don't expect it to make it into the top 32 (let's face it, Ketamine Addicted Pandas is about pandas that take ket and burn things, there's no hidden meanings or anything, it is just senseless violence and drug taking and panda orgies and necrophilia and torturing nazis for the sake of it - okay, the nazis deserve everything that is done to them), but it would really mean a lot to me if people would consider it. Even just talking about it on the brawl posts or mentioning it on your booktok will direct people who may like such things to Ketamine Addicted Pandas. And maybe a lot of people like it, but don't yet realise that this book exists. Thank you so much to those of you who have already not just purchased a copy or got an e-book in the giveaway, but told your friends. And thank you to those of you leaving reviews. Here's one below...
I don't think I've had anything reviewed this quickly since Ghetto Super Skank (I will try to do the third version of the cover in the upcoming months - I will eventually have one I'm happy with that contains lots of plastic flexistraws, which are no longer allowed to be sold and rats).
Thank you so much for the reviews. I may not see every review but I really appreciate them. The first is from the Coy Caterpillar. My favourite part of this review must be this quote: Theatrum Mortumm is unlike anything you’ll ever read. Even, for an extreme horror. I don’t know what I was expecting going into it, but it wasn’t this. This horror story chewed me up, spat me out and searched through my innards for something more. The second review is from Nat Whiston, and she does her's via video. I should probably buy her a replacement pizza. Thankfully we live in the same country so that might be possible one day.
I have actually had some erotica published recently (that isn't Stef and Tucker). I will be writing more erotica in the near-future (housing situation dependent, I don't really want to talk about those idiots right now or think about them because I just end up mumbling about how some people's stupidity is so harmful that they belong in a secure unit and clenching my fists and jaw).
The first one, my story In Love's Secret Domain is finally in print in the Juicy Bits anthology. I've included the video of me reading it below (yes, I really do like Coil that much). But make sure you scroll down after the video for the link to the other story (which is online for free).
That was recorded before Story Time (yes, I'm still sitting on Necro Sutra 3, I will do my best to record it in the beginning of February). A bit off topic, but I'm hoping to get Story Time up and running again over the Easter weekend, depending on what those idiots at Riverside Housing Association are doing. And keep scrolling for the next story.
In Love's Secret Domain has horror and bizarro elements, this next one has sci fi elements and is a lot tamer than In Love's Secret Domain. It is called Something Borrowed Something Blue. You can share that one with your friends without blushing.
If you do want longer erotica from me that incorporates horror, bizarro and a little touch of sci-fi, you really want to read 56 Seconds. As I said in my last post, I am trying my best to get shit done. I have been making some new book covers as some of my books are in need and if you read my last post, I clearly can't afford book covers (if I hear anyone say a premade is only $50 or whatever, I can't afford that $50, I've been dealing with housing problems all year, however, although I can't really afford it because it is for a long term thing in putting my portfolio together so I can seek employment as I intended when I finished university all those years ago, I do have Adobe and one month of Adobe is the cost of one very cheap premade book cover, I've made quite a few so far, plus numerous social media posts, Story Time etc so it is paying for itself as I put together my portfolio, which I really need to get better at and make it more diverse but I do have a good few years to do so, I don't plan on searching for a new job, preferably in a different country under a different name until my son finishes school, but otherwise, back down south). The first new one is for Ketamine Addicted Pandas, which I have put forward for the Books of Horror Indie Author Brawl. Then I did Stef and Tucker Book Two Jordan because that cover was horrific, especially when compared to the third Stef and Tucker book (Flowering Penises). The entire Stef and Tucker series can be purchased here. Then I gave a new cover to the first Stef and Tucker book. I don't plan on updating the other three Stef and Tucker covers, especially that third one which is a freehand GIMP masterpiece of flowering penises. It did take a few updates to get amazon to approve it because the back text blended into the background no matter what colour I tried (in the end, I partially erased part of the background). I do plan on at least releasing Stef and Tucker 6: Anal Exorcism in 2024. I wrote it in note form last year, so it is there and then going back to my notes from 2015-2016 for the Stef and Tucker book that follows that one (I can't remember the title, but I guess this is what happens when you can finally return to some older projects). Then I made a brand new book cover for January's godless release. This one actually took hours. Each one of those needles and stars needed to be individually sized and placed even though the entire thing was done in Adobe Express and Photoshop Express, which are a lot simpler than Photoshop itself (I did the bulk of the other covers in Photoshop, which is fun relearning, although I only can use it on the iPad right now, I still need to sort the harddrive on this computer to run that and InDesign and possibly Illustrator, but I don't want to talk about Illustrator, for now, the iPad fulfils all my film editing needs, although we shall see when I go to create a new title sequence for Story Time). And if you've been following my social media, especially instagram, I have been making some pretty posts. This one is for There Are No Dogs This Christmas and The Dog Dies At The End, both of which are exclusive to godless. I've been trying to at least run my selfies through Lightroom to get used to using it but I don't always have time. I don't know when I'll next get to post. I'm trying my best to get stuff done and boost my book sales while I have a brief break from dealing with this awful house that should have been fixed properly 8 years ago (or is it 9 now?). I have recently released a new print onto Redbubble as well. Hopefully, I'll be caught up soon and won't have to relive the trauma of 2008-2018 (although if I do, at least I can be single while doing it so it won't be as traumatic and I'll be able to bounce back quicker).
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